Is not being enough?
Maybe it's not being loved?
My biggest fear... Meeting who I was meant to be when I die and NOT
living up to who that person is!!
For many many years I've felt I've always fallen short.....soooo close...almost there...if only I could just.....ughhh!
I believe many of us seek purpose and a mission something that will help us identify who we are. We use our jobs as our identity but then find ourselves unfulfilled as we serve someone else's purpose. I know I've found myself in that situation over and over.
I was a hockey player then that didn't work out. Then I went into sales and I was a sales guy. I was good at it and there was some satisfaction knowing that I was providing a product/service that the industry needed.
Hmmm.... ok now we're onto something....helping others feels good!
Well let's continue down that path.....Then I moved into management. Lets manage people so we can help them be better at providing the product/service so that they can earn more money and in turn help the client/customer fulfill a need through the value of the product or service, (which we know makes us feel good, right?) We know the company will be happy because we are increasing revenue for them and that's good. And when the owner or board is happy that we are increasing sales and the customer is happy that they have product that serves a purpose and the sales person is happy that they are making money then I should be fulfilled because everyone involved has had their needs met and now it's my turn...right??
(Insert buzzer noise with Big Red X)
The Purpose of your life is to Fulfill the Need, Your need! NOT someone else's!
Most of us spend time trying to please and meet the needs of others, or the company, or coaches or managers, our fans, our spouse or children and we cast ourselves aside. This behaviour turns to regret, resentment, anger and creates waves of being unsatisfied leading to potentially becoming depressed or addicted to substances or coping mechanisms.
It took a lot of soul searching, reading, and a keen interest in becoming a better person to help correct the path my mind was on. And I found that the best way for me to feel fulfilled is by being of service to others. Not for a paycheck, but to see the difference I could make in someone's life. That look you get from someone when you have added value to them through gratitude or sharing or teaching that has given them "something" that they didn't have before they met you.
What a feeling!
So I leave you with this, if at 50 I can look back on my life and make a change to pursue my mission, which has changed several times and walk away from a salary and a safety net to follow my passion....it's never to late to pursue what makes you happy and fulfills YOUR need!